Friday, October 16, 2009

Chimney Sloppins

Chim chiminey
Chim chiminey
Chim chim cher-ee!
We are as lucky
As lucky can be

Chim chiminey
Chim chiminey
Chim chim cher-oo!
Just one more fire
And our house mighta gone ka-BOOM!
(And the cleaning was just $90
So that's lucky too)

Now as the conditions
Of chimneys ar' strung
The state of our chimney
twas on the bottommost rung

25 pounds of creosote
Seems like a lot
An' said me good sweeper
If 'at stuff gits hot

It'll blow up your chimney
And burn your house down
And out in the drizzle
You'll slap on a frown

So heed my good words friends
'Tis worth spending a buck
If your creosote ignites
You'll be shit outta luck

So call your good sweeper
Have him bring his broom
And scrape sweep and chisel
Out potential doom

Now that our house won't be reduced
To ashes and smoke
In this 'ole wide world
There's no 'appier bloke

Chim chim cher-ee
Chim cher-oo!


  1. My, aren't we clever today! It'd be pretty "sooty" to burn down your house. Way to be pro-active with your fireplace!

  2. Whoa! David's first blog post. And Double whoa! That is NASTY stuff...where did that come from??

  3. When we bought this place, last year, we asked the then-owners to have the chimney swept. They gave us the receipt for the sweeping, but upon checking, myself (this weekend), I can see there is NO WAY it was swept. We've never had a fire in there, yet the chimney is FULL of creosote!! Would you recommend your sweeper to a neighbor? (Thanks, in advance!)

  4. Sure - we used metro chimney - see - and they charged just $90 for the sweep, which is a good price.